On several visits to Dad during October and November, I have found him to be out of bed, dressed, and socializing with other residents and staff. I've been told that Dad has been getting up more and trying to move around, however Dad does not realize how weak he is and has a tendency to loose balance and fall. So as not to discourage him from getting out of bed, he is relegated to a wheelchair...and he still tries to get up on his own but can't. That upsets him and he says he doesn't understand what's going on.
On Tuesday, October 30th, Shelley and Tabitha were with me visiting Dad and he seemed to be in a good mood so I took the opportunity to call Joyce, his daughter, and Noemi, his sister, both in San Antonio. Their conversations were short but they got to hear his voice and could carry on a conversation that was only clear in his mind. (See photo below)
Sunday, November 18th was the annual lunch where families are invited to attend and enjoy a meal as a family at the nursing home. This year joining Dad at the dinner table were Tabitha, Kevin, Shelley, and me. Dad thought we were at a restaurant, which he said he comes to often. Dad didn't finish his meal but he sure loved the Sparkling Cider and had several refills. I took some great pictures, but lost them when I tried to download them. We all had a very enjoyable meal together as a family.
A couple of days later Shelley, Tabitha and I met with the head nurse and social director for our regular quarterly "Care Meeting." For the most part Dad is doing quite well considering he had been under hospice about seven months prior. He does eat well enough and, very importantly, has good fluid intake.
Upon arriving at the nursing home for my most recent visit, the receptionist saw me smiled and said, "Oh, good you're here. Your Dad has been asking for you." As we approached Dad, sitting in his wheelchair, the receptionist told Dad, "Look who's here!" Dad did not seem to recognize me so the receptionist asked, "Who have you been asking for all day?" Dad did not respond so the receptionist said, "It's your son!" Dad looked at me then at her and said, "No it's not." The receptionist reiterated to Dad that I was truly his son (and repeated this a couple of times) to which Dad replied, while getting angry, "That's not my son!" "Well then who is he?" asked the receptionist. My Dad responded with, "It's one of my cousins."
Afterwards, Shelley and I discussed what had transpired and based on what he talked about, he was probably expecting his son to be a young boy. I seemed more like a cousin to him because I am the age his cousin would have been for the time period his mind was at. That's what makes each visit unique, it's not a time to catch up with the latest news, but rather it is a mystery to solve and the question is, "Where are you in your life's timeline?"
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| This photo was taken on October 30, the day he spoke to both his daughter and sister. |
Thanks for reading!
